Apparently there’s a new thing where parents post pictures
of their toddlers crying or having tantrums and basically laugh at them. Now I
have to say, I have a toddler and I get that parents need to vent. I get it big
time. I will say that mine had a tantrum a couple of weeks ago because I took
the string off the banana I had peeled for him. And he wanted it. What the
heck? So, I get it. I do. We are frustrated beyond belief. But I don’t like the
mocking thing. Who wants to be laughed at? Whether you are 2 or 92, no one
likes that. I realize these kids may not realize they are being laughed at in
many cases. But I have to say that kids, big and small, pick up on a lot more
things than I think we realize. In any event, finding pleasure in someone
else’s pain is a little on the disturbing side to me. I know that what they are
upset about is, in our estimation, ridiculous. Even stupid. But it’s important
to them. And they are important to us. So we should take them seriously. I
think a better way to look at it is that they are frustrated when they can’t
have something or do something that they want to. And I think they inherently
know they don’t have a lot of control in their world. So they get frustrated,
angry and upset quite easily. I don’t think it even matters what the actual
issue is. They just have a tough time because of where they are
developmentally. That helps me anyway to have a little more patience and not
lose it completely sometimes. Especially after 4 or 5 meltdowns in one day.
Ok. Gotta say, I am hating this post. I threw it together and I don’t like my writing lately. But I’m determined to do an M post, so there you go….
Hi, I totally agree Cheryl. I think it says more about the adult than the child. Mind you I can't even watch those programmes that show people/children/animals having sill accidents, like 'You've Been Framed'.
ReplyDeleteSuzanne @ Suzannes Tribe
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Thanks for commenting. And yeah, it does say something about the adult and it's not a good thing IMO.
DeleteThis is a great post. Shaming in any form is not an effective deterrent with children. And what gets put on the web stays on the web - forever. "Teasing" in the guise of "having fun" is also potentially damaging. I can remember my uncle making me cry by pretending he'd forgotten my name. It seems like a small thing, but I've never forgotten how frustrated I felt. He meant well - he's never struck me as a cruel person - and I love him, but I wish someone had stopped him at the time instead of finding it amusing.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comment. And thanks for sharing that about your uncle. Sometimes we take things lightly with kids but forget that they may take it very seriously and remember it long after we think the "joke" is over.
DeleteGood for you for writing anyway despite your feelings on writing! I just realized I forgot to write an "N" post and am feeling similarly. thinking..."Nobody's making me write something. I could just skip a day." But I'm reading this post and realizing, yeah, no. I have to write anyway. Thanks for putting it down.
ReplyDeleteWonderful post, right til the end when you belittled your work. There was no need to do that when this post was right on with such a powerful message. It is true that sadly it is really the adults acting badly and the more people see this behavior the more becomes okay so it is important to speak out about it. Your kids are very lucky.
ReplyDeletekatloveswriting.blogspot.com
I'm totally with you ... and, remarkably, my 22-month-old toddler Hoot had that same tantrum over a banana string on Monday. Maybe we're the ones missing something?
ReplyDelete